John McGran
eDiets Editor-in-Chief
I think one of the best part of my job as editor-in-chief here at eDiets.com is getting acquainted with a smorgasbord of ultra-creative freelance writers. Over the past seven years, I've discovered that just when you think you've heard -- or better yet, read -- just about every writing style out there someone comes along with a truly unique delivery.
Sally Ketchum is one of those talented word tailors that I've stumbled upon. And no, that doesn't make her just sew-sew as a writer. Sally lives, cooks and writes from the shores of northern Lake Michigan, so maybe we can blame the solitude for her unique stylings.
Whether she's writing about asparagus, diet crimes, beer food or the dog days of summer for eDiets.com, Sally does it with an eccentric flair reminiscent of another Midwesterner... a certain Garrison Keillor. You could say she's a woman with a pun -- and she's not afraid to use it!
Yes, I have a soft spot for Sally... and I hope it's in my heart rather than my head.
So a week back when Sally sent me a little list she was concocting for her own fun and -- if she were lucky -- diet motivation, I immediately saw a joint effort in the making. Sally reckoned she'd churn out some 100 uniquely different diet tips before she was ready to shop it for publication. But I convinced her to part with her first 50 or so tips, so I could work them into today's column.
If you're like me, you've digested thousands of diet tips over the years. I guarantee you've read few like these. But for all you level-headed types who are searching for common-sense advice, I've included 14 bonus diet tips you can really take to heart. And why's that? Well, mainly because they were provided by the American Heart Association.
But before you get to the more standard AHA tips, you need to get out your machete and hack your way through the 60 uniquely different diet tips, as provided by Sally Ketchum with a little bonus help from Mr. Bad Food.
Be warned: you may find yourself being educated on weight loss at the same time you are being entertained. And now, I bring you...
The Eager Eater Food Writer's Eccentric Diet
by Sally Ketchum
1. Get a puppy. I suggest a 12-week-old Jack Russell. Name him Pounds. Teach your new puppy to jump. Inspiration to diet will come as folks fervently cry, "Down Pounds!"
2. Substitute low-fat cottage cheese for salad dressing. No fat is no fun.
3. Buy a bag of your favorite pretzels. Open the bag. And leave it open, on a counter for 5 days. Eat the stale pretzels as they appeal to you.
4. Put your dog on a diet for inspiration. He or she is probably fat. Pounds will be in good shape from walking with you and jumping on the UPS and Fed Ex men.
5. Garden. If aren’t a gardener now, start. Even lugging a couple of pots inside helps. Further, it is not only a worthy pursuit, but it's also great exercise.
6. Eat a meatless boiled dinner once a week. Salt, pepper. Each week lessen the butter (or use an olive oil-based spread... it's even better!) you use on your plate.
7. What to put on your fridge door? A photo of lover, spouse or significant other when he or she was most attractive.
8. The sugar and salt shock: Use 3-pound salt boxes and 5-pound sugar bags to visibly shock you and invigorate self-control. Lose 5 pounds? Put a 5-pound bag of sugar on a kitchen counter. Lose 3? Put a Kosher salt box next to it. Seeing the growing line of sugar and salt, lifting up a 5-pound bag representing your loss will amaze you and inspire you to make the line even longer.
9. When not in public, eat with your fingers, then lick fingers and pretend they are calories to count.
10. Eat Wasa or Rye Crisp (try the seasoned type!) often as needed and in emergencies.
11. Decide what works for you: weigh yourself weekly, daily or more.
12. Grow herbs on a windowsill; enjoy them on your food.
13. As you lose weight, keep the last pair of too-big jeans on a colored hanger. Replace them when you lose more with smaller pair of "too-big" jeans.
14. Hang warning signs, magazine clips of fatties, gruesome gloppy cakes and pigs in a sty from your kitchen ceiling. They’ll dangle in the air and drive you crazy and thin. The timid might use a workplace bulletin board.
15. Fill in the blank daily: My _______ looks better now. Jowls? Neck? Belly?
16. Invent cut-down strategies. For instance, if you eat soup with 4 crackers and a bit of butter then cut down a little each week. First: butter. Second: 3 crackers. Third: 2 crackers Fourth: 1 cracker. Fifth: Less caloric soup. Go as far as you can sensibly.
17. Do as much housework and gardening as you can. Walk Pounds, the dog, two extra walks a week.
18. Turn cottage cheese, lemon juice and herbs like tarragon, basil and thyme into a creamy salad dressing. Blend in a food processor.
19. Put lightweight items that you use frequently on high selves requiring reaching.
20. Walk around the room every commercial on the TV.
21. Best to start a diet in spring. It’s easier to get out to exercise. Local greens come in, and then tomatoes. Eat all the low-cal tomatoes you can in season. By fall, you will have good eating habits established, so the fattening winter dishes won’t tempt you.
22. Give up one thing at a time, a thing that is possible. For instance, give up potato chips completely. Later, weeks or months, give up a second thing, while still not eating chips.
23. Get a scale that signals when its battery is running out. For a few days, you can start your mornings with a boost. The scale says "Low."
24. Eat bright and dark colored foods: beets, chard, red cabbage, red lettuces and more.
25. Man or woman, buy a pair of boots. They will make you look taller; but more importantly, they will make you aware of posture. Remember Nancy Sinatra?
26. Scout tall, slim trees as you walk, travel or peruse garden catalogs. Enjoy the art of slim.
27. Use pillar candles and cloth napkins to enhance dinner when dinner is diet eating.
28. Look at the posters at Pounds' veterinary office. You’ll see how harmful fat is, even to animals.
29. Use a particular and special set of flatware, antique or modern, or a colored fork, knife and spoon. One more way to promote awareness of what you eat. Food is the game.
30. Change where you sit at the table. It adds more awareness, and it breaks routine too, which is also a healthy thing.
31. Plan a special dinner when you reach a goal: a picnic, a formal meal or ethnic food.
32. Get Pounds a monstrous, ugly, fat dog toy.
33. Give Pounds a dog chew and you should chew a stick of gum. Think about how it feels. Enjoy no or low calories.
34. Go to the library and get a children’s book, for very young kids, about each of these: rhinos, elephants and whales. Look through them every night before dinner for a week.
35. Make a crossword of diet words. Go for multi-syllable ones. "Gastronomic," anyone?
37. Next time at the mall, count the heavy shoppers. See how quickly you can get to 25.
38. Pray for good health.
39. Get Pounds a bone, eat alone, eat a steak and spend time chewing on the bone.
40. Try lemon juice on veggies.
41. Get a seafood cookbook.
42. Watch your ring size and see if it starts to feel loose.
43. List 7 foods that are good for you that you will work into your diet over the next 7 days.
44. List a healthy, low-calorie food that is associated with each of the 50 states. Check each that you have sampled -- and make a pact to sample all 50 soon!
45. Secret fun: Give $5 to the first person you see that says, "My, you’ve lost weight!" or "Boy, you’re looking good! New haircut?"
46. For folks seriously overweight: Find and study the standard for Jack Russell Terriers and consider getting Pounds a mate. Caring for a litter of Jack Russells is a secret Hollywood diet strategy.
47. Get the pups collars with lots of bling and a multiple dog leash arrangement. Walk down through an upscale shopping street with them on weekends.
48. Eat raw carrots for snacks.
49. Investigate healthy vegetables and fruits, perhaps new to you: eggplant, English cucumbers, Florence fennel (the bulb type), white peaches and more.
50. Choose low-calorie condiments like pesto, horseradish, and mustard. Avoid sweet chutneys, mayonnaise and tempting sugary things like jams and jellies.
Sally Ketchum is a Michigan writer and author. She writes in many genres, children's books to poetry, but somehow the works always include food or dieting. She can be reached at ketchum1985@gmail.com.
What's that? I can hear you shouting... "But wait, Mr. Bad Food ... you promised us 60 uniquely different dieting tips!" And so I did. Well, this is where I chip in with my 10 personal tips for you, the unique dieter.
Mr. Bad Food's Drop 10 Top 10 Tips!
1. Play and/or roughhouse with the children. Do it often. Do it outdoors. The fresh air, coupled with the companionship of your kids, will make you feel better mentally and physically.
2. Don't have any kids? Wrestle with your husband, wife or mate. A little close contact can lead to another fun form of exercise that'll make you and your significant other happy to be huffing and puffing!
3. Empty your snack cabinet or drawer and stock it with healthy foods and plenty of those no-cal water flavorers. I'm currently hooked on the Wal-Mart orange drink, lemonade and fruit drink flavors. They add no calories, but do add plenty of taste. Bland is bad when you are trying to establish healthy, new habits.
4. Get a bicycle or motorcycle and start admiring Mother Nature rather than your TV screen. Sure, a cycle cruise won't burn as many calories as a bike ride, but it can keep you away from food or temptation and that's a plus.
5. Get up from your computer much more often. I find that sitting in front of a screen -- TV, movie or computer -- fires up my desire to eat and drink. Get immersed in a book or magazine (but please don't salivate over the food images).
6. Volunteer. I coach soccer for 16 6-to-8-year-olds. During the summer, Coach John (me) taught t-ball to a pack of 4-6-year-olds. It gets me off my butt and on the field with kids who keep me feeling young and alive.
7. Stop using meat as a condiment or side dish. No more bacon on your burgers... no more sausage or pepperoni on your pizza... no more shrimp on your steak... no more sausage with your eggs and bacon breakfast. The menu choices may remain high in fat, sodium and calories BUT they won't be as bad as they could have been. Sometimes it's the little victories that help us win the war.
8. Read labels and actually follow the suggested serving size. That muffin says two servings, so break it in half (and make it an even break!), then give away the other half or save it for the next day. Same goes for that 20-ounce bottle of soda. Drink eight ounces at a time and save the rest.
9. Don't have a cow man! Eat one meat-free meal a day. But be sure to replace the meat with healthy vegetarian fare, not a super-cheesy, high-cal concoction! Vegetarians do get fat too if they make bad choices.
10. Come to terms with the fact weight loss and dieting are more about healthy eating and regular exercise rather than deprivation and suffering. This is your life. Only you can prevent forest fires... and only you can convince yourself you are tired of carting around your extra pounds and you are ready to take the steps needed to get in shape. Once you commit to this desired change of life, let us help. eDiets.com offers a wealth of caring experts and great fitness and diet programs.
14 Great Diet Tips from the American Heart Association
1. People with congestive heart failure should use food labels and a nutrition guide to limit sodium (salt) intake to no more than 2,000 milligrams per day -- roughly the equivalent of one teaspoon -- or whatever your doctor recommends. Salt causes the body to retain fluid, which increases the heart's workload.
2. Remove the salt shaker from the kitchen table and stovetop to avoid cooking with salt or using it at meals. Use salt-free seasonings instead.
3. Drain and rinse canned foods before preparing them to remove some of the salt.
4. To reduce fat intake, substitute fat-free milk and nonfat or low-fat frozen yogurt for whole milk, cream and ice cream.
5. To make meat dishes healthier, trim all visible fat from cuts of beef and pork, and remove the skin from chicken and turkey.
6. When reading food labels, pay attention to how many servings are in a package. To control sodium, fat and cholesterol intake, make sure that your serving size is the same as the recommended one.
7. Substitute fresh vegetables, fruits and foods labeled "low sodium" for canned and processed foods, which are usually high in salt.
8. Establish a rapport with the owner and servers at favorite restaurants. This will make it easier to negotiate the menu and ask for low-fat, low-salt versions of certain dishes.
9. For dessert, choose fresh fruit, fruit ice, sherbet, gelatin or angel food cake, which are good alternatives to fat- and cream-laden sweets.
10. Some people with heart failure need to limit how much liquid they take in every day. Many doctors recommend eight cups or less, but check with your doctor to see what's best.
11. Don't fry foods. Instead, bake, broil, roast, boil or microwave for less fat and fewer calories.
12. Invest in a nonstick frying pan. Then you can use little or no oil (which adds fat and cholesterol) without having food stick.
13. If a recipe calls for butter and eggs, try substituting polyunsaturated margarine (1 tablespoon) or oil (3/4 tablespoon) for a tablespoon of butter, and egg white (1) plus unsaturated oil (2 teaspoons) for one egg.
14. When eating out, ask to substitute a healthier alternative, such as a plain baked potato or unsalted vegetables for a high-sodium, high-fat side dish like fries or onion rings.
Sphere: Related Content
eDiets Editor-in-Chief
I think one of the best part of my job as editor-in-chief here at eDiets.com is getting acquainted with a smorgasbord of ultra-creative freelance writers. Over the past seven years, I've discovered that just when you think you've heard -- or better yet, read -- just about every writing style out there someone comes along with a truly unique delivery.
Sally Ketchum is one of those talented word tailors that I've stumbled upon. And no, that doesn't make her just sew-sew as a writer. Sally lives, cooks and writes from the shores of northern Lake Michigan, so maybe we can blame the solitude for her unique stylings.
Whether she's writing about asparagus, diet crimes, beer food or the dog days of summer for eDiets.com, Sally does it with an eccentric flair reminiscent of another Midwesterner... a certain Garrison Keillor. You could say she's a woman with a pun -- and she's not afraid to use it!
Yes, I have a soft spot for Sally... and I hope it's in my heart rather than my head.
So a week back when Sally sent me a little list she was concocting for her own fun and -- if she were lucky -- diet motivation, I immediately saw a joint effort in the making. Sally reckoned she'd churn out some 100 uniquely different diet tips before she was ready to shop it for publication. But I convinced her to part with her first 50 or so tips, so I could work them into today's column.
If you're like me, you've digested thousands of diet tips over the years. I guarantee you've read few like these. But for all you level-headed types who are searching for common-sense advice, I've included 14 bonus diet tips you can really take to heart. And why's that? Well, mainly because they were provided by the American Heart Association.
But before you get to the more standard AHA tips, you need to get out your machete and hack your way through the 60 uniquely different diet tips, as provided by Sally Ketchum with a little bonus help from Mr. Bad Food.
Be warned: you may find yourself being educated on weight loss at the same time you are being entertained. And now, I bring you...
The Eager Eater Food Writer's Eccentric Diet
by Sally Ketchum
1. Get a puppy. I suggest a 12-week-old Jack Russell. Name him Pounds. Teach your new puppy to jump. Inspiration to diet will come as folks fervently cry, "Down Pounds!"
2. Substitute low-fat cottage cheese for salad dressing. No fat is no fun.
3. Buy a bag of your favorite pretzels. Open the bag. And leave it open, on a counter for 5 days. Eat the stale pretzels as they appeal to you.
4. Put your dog on a diet for inspiration. He or she is probably fat. Pounds will be in good shape from walking with you and jumping on the UPS and Fed Ex men.
5. Garden. If aren’t a gardener now, start. Even lugging a couple of pots inside helps. Further, it is not only a worthy pursuit, but it's also great exercise.
6. Eat a meatless boiled dinner once a week. Salt, pepper. Each week lessen the butter (or use an olive oil-based spread... it's even better!) you use on your plate.
7. What to put on your fridge door? A photo of lover, spouse or significant other when he or she was most attractive.
8. The sugar and salt shock: Use 3-pound salt boxes and 5-pound sugar bags to visibly shock you and invigorate self-control. Lose 5 pounds? Put a 5-pound bag of sugar on a kitchen counter. Lose 3? Put a Kosher salt box next to it. Seeing the growing line of sugar and salt, lifting up a 5-pound bag representing your loss will amaze you and inspire you to make the line even longer.
9. When not in public, eat with your fingers, then lick fingers and pretend they are calories to count.
10. Eat Wasa or Rye Crisp (try the seasoned type!) often as needed and in emergencies.
11. Decide what works for you: weigh yourself weekly, daily or more.
12. Grow herbs on a windowsill; enjoy them on your food.
13. As you lose weight, keep the last pair of too-big jeans on a colored hanger. Replace them when you lose more with smaller pair of "too-big" jeans.
14. Hang warning signs, magazine clips of fatties, gruesome gloppy cakes and pigs in a sty from your kitchen ceiling. They’ll dangle in the air and drive you crazy and thin. The timid might use a workplace bulletin board.
15. Fill in the blank daily: My _______ looks better now. Jowls? Neck? Belly?
16. Invent cut-down strategies. For instance, if you eat soup with 4 crackers and a bit of butter then cut down a little each week. First: butter. Second: 3 crackers. Third: 2 crackers Fourth: 1 cracker. Fifth: Less caloric soup. Go as far as you can sensibly.
17. Do as much housework and gardening as you can. Walk Pounds, the dog, two extra walks a week.
18. Turn cottage cheese, lemon juice and herbs like tarragon, basil and thyme into a creamy salad dressing. Blend in a food processor.
19. Put lightweight items that you use frequently on high selves requiring reaching.
20. Walk around the room every commercial on the TV.
21. Best to start a diet in spring. It’s easier to get out to exercise. Local greens come in, and then tomatoes. Eat all the low-cal tomatoes you can in season. By fall, you will have good eating habits established, so the fattening winter dishes won’t tempt you.
22. Give up one thing at a time, a thing that is possible. For instance, give up potato chips completely. Later, weeks or months, give up a second thing, while still not eating chips.
23. Get a scale that signals when its battery is running out. For a few days, you can start your mornings with a boost. The scale says "Low."
24. Eat bright and dark colored foods: beets, chard, red cabbage, red lettuces and more.
25. Man or woman, buy a pair of boots. They will make you look taller; but more importantly, they will make you aware of posture. Remember Nancy Sinatra?
26. Scout tall, slim trees as you walk, travel or peruse garden catalogs. Enjoy the art of slim.
27. Use pillar candles and cloth napkins to enhance dinner when dinner is diet eating.
28. Look at the posters at Pounds' veterinary office. You’ll see how harmful fat is, even to animals.
29. Use a particular and special set of flatware, antique or modern, or a colored fork, knife and spoon. One more way to promote awareness of what you eat. Food is the game.
30. Change where you sit at the table. It adds more awareness, and it breaks routine too, which is also a healthy thing.
31. Plan a special dinner when you reach a goal: a picnic, a formal meal or ethnic food.
32. Get Pounds a monstrous, ugly, fat dog toy.
33. Give Pounds a dog chew and you should chew a stick of gum. Think about how it feels. Enjoy no or low calories.
34. Go to the library and get a children’s book, for very young kids, about each of these: rhinos, elephants and whales. Look through them every night before dinner for a week.
35. Make a crossword of diet words. Go for multi-syllable ones. "Gastronomic," anyone?
37. Next time at the mall, count the heavy shoppers. See how quickly you can get to 25.
38. Pray for good health.
39. Get Pounds a bone, eat alone, eat a steak and spend time chewing on the bone.
40. Try lemon juice on veggies.
41. Get a seafood cookbook.
42. Watch your ring size and see if it starts to feel loose.
43. List 7 foods that are good for you that you will work into your diet over the next 7 days.
44. List a healthy, low-calorie food that is associated with each of the 50 states. Check each that you have sampled -- and make a pact to sample all 50 soon!
45. Secret fun: Give $5 to the first person you see that says, "My, you’ve lost weight!" or "Boy, you’re looking good! New haircut?"
46. For folks seriously overweight: Find and study the standard for Jack Russell Terriers and consider getting Pounds a mate. Caring for a litter of Jack Russells is a secret Hollywood diet strategy.
47. Get the pups collars with lots of bling and a multiple dog leash arrangement. Walk down through an upscale shopping street with them on weekends.
48. Eat raw carrots for snacks.
49. Investigate healthy vegetables and fruits, perhaps new to you: eggplant, English cucumbers, Florence fennel (the bulb type), white peaches and more.
50. Choose low-calorie condiments like pesto, horseradish, and mustard. Avoid sweet chutneys, mayonnaise and tempting sugary things like jams and jellies.
Sally Ketchum is a Michigan writer and author. She writes in many genres, children's books to poetry, but somehow the works always include food or dieting. She can be reached at ketchum1985@gmail.com.
What's that? I can hear you shouting... "But wait, Mr. Bad Food ... you promised us 60 uniquely different dieting tips!" And so I did. Well, this is where I chip in with my 10 personal tips for you, the unique dieter.
Mr. Bad Food's Drop 10 Top 10 Tips!
1. Play and/or roughhouse with the children. Do it often. Do it outdoors. The fresh air, coupled with the companionship of your kids, will make you feel better mentally and physically.
2. Don't have any kids? Wrestle with your husband, wife or mate. A little close contact can lead to another fun form of exercise that'll make you and your significant other happy to be huffing and puffing!
3. Empty your snack cabinet or drawer and stock it with healthy foods and plenty of those no-cal water flavorers. I'm currently hooked on the Wal-Mart orange drink, lemonade and fruit drink flavors. They add no calories, but do add plenty of taste. Bland is bad when you are trying to establish healthy, new habits.
4. Get a bicycle or motorcycle and start admiring Mother Nature rather than your TV screen. Sure, a cycle cruise won't burn as many calories as a bike ride, but it can keep you away from food or temptation and that's a plus.
5. Get up from your computer much more often. I find that sitting in front of a screen -- TV, movie or computer -- fires up my desire to eat and drink. Get immersed in a book or magazine (but please don't salivate over the food images).
6. Volunteer. I coach soccer for 16 6-to-8-year-olds. During the summer, Coach John (me) taught t-ball to a pack of 4-6-year-olds. It gets me off my butt and on the field with kids who keep me feeling young and alive.
7. Stop using meat as a condiment or side dish. No more bacon on your burgers... no more sausage or pepperoni on your pizza... no more shrimp on your steak... no more sausage with your eggs and bacon breakfast. The menu choices may remain high in fat, sodium and calories BUT they won't be as bad as they could have been. Sometimes it's the little victories that help us win the war.
8. Read labels and actually follow the suggested serving size. That muffin says two servings, so break it in half (and make it an even break!), then give away the other half or save it for the next day. Same goes for that 20-ounce bottle of soda. Drink eight ounces at a time and save the rest.
9. Don't have a cow man! Eat one meat-free meal a day. But be sure to replace the meat with healthy vegetarian fare, not a super-cheesy, high-cal concoction! Vegetarians do get fat too if they make bad choices.
10. Come to terms with the fact weight loss and dieting are more about healthy eating and regular exercise rather than deprivation and suffering. This is your life. Only you can prevent forest fires... and only you can convince yourself you are tired of carting around your extra pounds and you are ready to take the steps needed to get in shape. Once you commit to this desired change of life, let us help. eDiets.com offers a wealth of caring experts and great fitness and diet programs.
14 Great Diet Tips from the American Heart Association
1. People with congestive heart failure should use food labels and a nutrition guide to limit sodium (salt) intake to no more than 2,000 milligrams per day -- roughly the equivalent of one teaspoon -- or whatever your doctor recommends. Salt causes the body to retain fluid, which increases the heart's workload.
2. Remove the salt shaker from the kitchen table and stovetop to avoid cooking with salt or using it at meals. Use salt-free seasonings instead.
3. Drain and rinse canned foods before preparing them to remove some of the salt.
4. To reduce fat intake, substitute fat-free milk and nonfat or low-fat frozen yogurt for whole milk, cream and ice cream.
5. To make meat dishes healthier, trim all visible fat from cuts of beef and pork, and remove the skin from chicken and turkey.
6. When reading food labels, pay attention to how many servings are in a package. To control sodium, fat and cholesterol intake, make sure that your serving size is the same as the recommended one.
7. Substitute fresh vegetables, fruits and foods labeled "low sodium" for canned and processed foods, which are usually high in salt.
8. Establish a rapport with the owner and servers at favorite restaurants. This will make it easier to negotiate the menu and ask for low-fat, low-salt versions of certain dishes.
9. For dessert, choose fresh fruit, fruit ice, sherbet, gelatin or angel food cake, which are good alternatives to fat- and cream-laden sweets.
10. Some people with heart failure need to limit how much liquid they take in every day. Many doctors recommend eight cups or less, but check with your doctor to see what's best.
11. Don't fry foods. Instead, bake, broil, roast, boil or microwave for less fat and fewer calories.
12. Invest in a nonstick frying pan. Then you can use little or no oil (which adds fat and cholesterol) without having food stick.
13. If a recipe calls for butter and eggs, try substituting polyunsaturated margarine (1 tablespoon) or oil (3/4 tablespoon) for a tablespoon of butter, and egg white (1) plus unsaturated oil (2 teaspoons) for one egg.
14. When eating out, ask to substitute a healthier alternative, such as a plain baked potato or unsalted vegetables for a high-sodium, high-fat side dish like fries or onion rings.
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